Poem of the week

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Some poems rhyme
But this one doesn't

Quote of the week

"Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

Jokes of the week

Q: Do you know why the Utes football team should change its name to the "Opossums"?

A: Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

Q: Did you hear about the fire in the Utes football dorm that destroyed 20 books?

A: The real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet.

It was reported that Utah head football coach Kyle Whittingham will only be dressing twenty players for the BYU game. The rest of the players will have to get dressed by themselves.

Q. What did the Utah graduate say to the BYU graduate?

A. "Welcome to McDonald's. May I take your order, please?"

Q: Did you hear about the power outage at the University of Utah library?

A: Forty students were stuck on the escalator for three hours.

Q: What should you do if you find three University of Utah fans buried up to their neck in cement?

A: Get more cement.

If you see a Utah Ute fan on a bike, why should you not swerve to hit him?

It could be your bike.